I never knew the difference between pleasing and serving. I guess because I thought they were one and the same. But I have come to see more recently that they most definitely are not!

I was lucky enough to have interviewed Steve Chandler on my Effortless Lifestyle Program last year and I loved what he had to say about the difference.

We know when we are pleasing because the focus comes back on us.

We become worried about whether the person in front of us will like us or not and we act accordingly.

We go against our better judgements and don’t say things in case it may offend the other person, and worry more about their response versus listening to our wisdom.

We may reduce our prices, go into partnerships that are more of a win-lose for us, we spend time wanting them to become our friend as we think that this will please the other person, and forget that charging what is uncomfortable to us, is actually a way for your clients to commit to the process of change.

Service is a different kettle of fish. We say things that need to be said, we get things done that need to get done, we don’t see the person in front of us as someone that needs to get to like us, but as someone that needs to hear what others won’t say and be asked questions that others won’t ask. We don’t need them to be our friend but we see ourselves as their guide.

If you can see that their feelings and experience of you comes from them and not from you, taking how they respond to you now becomes non-personal.

As it’s always been non-personal.

Be bold, be courageous and be of service and this will create the raving fans you want!